Personal History Work

Biografie Sitzung: Paarberatung und Eheberatung - Paartherapie und Sexualberatung - Systemische Familien-Therapie

In the second and third sessions we work on the underlying causes of the conflict.

Normally, these come from our past: They are conditioned by the familial situation in which we grew up, and by previous experiences and wounds that re-surface in the current relationship.

During biographical work, it makes sense for us to focus on one of the partners individually, while the other partner takes the role of an active witness. In this way, he / she can develop understanding and also empathy for the everyday actions and reactions of their partner. This empathy is in turn the condition for forgiveness and letting go of one’s pent-up resentments.

Often this biographical work reveals hidden or unconscious complications with one’s parents, parents-in-law, previous partners, or even with one’s own children.

We try to process as much biographical material in the second and third sessions as is possible, but in the case of deep-seated wounds or trauma it may be appropriate to hold several individual woman-to-woman or man-to-man sessions. This may also be the case if it is too shameful to work through this material in front of one’s partner, or if the couple ends up separating during the process.

Regardless of whether it happens in individual or couple’s sessions, this section of couple’s counseling is intended to bring you back on the path to yourself. It provides an impetus to examine oneself and one’s relationship in their current states, and then based on that examination to creatively allow something new to emerge.

At the beginning, this is often only a seed, and it lays within the partners’ personal responsibility to decide whether they will nurture it, or would rather part.